The Lazy Post

It’s been a heck of a week already, and it’s only Tuesday. And Tuesday is gonna act like a complete and total Monday. The 8:00am kind. So here is something funny to ponder while I get my ducks back in their damn line.

I bet if I had one of those bad boys, I’d be comfy all the time. And nobody would bother me. Do you seriously see yourself walking up to a woman wearing a sleeping bag in Walmart and telling her that she has too many items for the express checkout lane? I don’t think so. And nobody would jump in front of me and get in my face to ask me who I was voting for if I was wearing a sleeping bag with pants, because he would be kind of afraid that I would answer with his candidate’s name.

The only problem I have with this outfit is the lack of arms. If someone went to the trouble to put legs in it so you wouldn’t look like a douche HOPPING in a sleeping bag, why didn’t he also put arms in it? How am I going to lift a wine glass? More importantly, how am I going to defend myself from the hordes of people who realize I’m now defenseless because my arms are pinned inside the sleeping bag I’m wearing in the mall food court? Because you are kind of asking for a beat down just for wearing a sleeping bag, but then the inventor had to go and put a “I can’t hit you back” sign right in the middle of the whole thing. Way to think it through, asswipe.

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3 thoughts on “The Lazy Post

  1. Yeah, like, if you fell, how would you get up? Use your head for leverage? I thought about inventing an anti-yellow jacket suit, but it would be more like a stainless steel burkha.

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