Our local radio station has a December feature during the morning show called “Grinch of the Day.” They report on horrible stories of Christmas-cheer-gone-wrong and name the culprit to be the Grinch. Of the day. Duh. That’s why they call it that.
I am mildly proud of myself for never having been named the Grinch. I am neither confirming nor denying whether or not I deserve the title, I’m just saying that I’m happy that I’ve never been honored as the Grinch because it would mean that I had been caught doing something very un-Christmasy. Like popping my neighbor’s stupid, stupid inflatable Santa Claus. Or swapping out the Baby Jesus doll at this one church’s nativity scene with a Teletubby doll.
I have to admit that the most un-Christmasy thing I’ve done so far this year is to not decorate the house for the holidays. At all. I did go so far as to get the Christmas decorations out of storage and block the front door with them, but that’s just because that’s where I stacked everything. I plan to just leave all the boxes there and scatter our gifts around them. My kids aren’t dumb, they know what a tree looks like. I don’t have to SHOW them.
But my daughter nearly threw me over the Grinchy edge with her Christmas wish list. First of all, my kids have never made wish lists. We’ve had fleeting random conversations about their interests, and those would result in me picking out the most awesome gifts ever. This year, though, my daughter felt the need to spell it all out for me so I wouldn’t mess it up.
With a Power Point.
My offspring made me a Power Point presentation of what she wants for Christmas. Funny, I didn’t see “coal” anywhere on the slides.