X-rated Haiku

There’s a terrible drawback to trying to break into the literary world while knowing that your mother has signed up to follow your emails, your blog, your Facebook posts and your tweets: every once in a while the opportunity to get your name out there comes in the form of writing erotic poetry.

Haiku, to be exact, with points awarded for raunchiness involving not only Hello Kitty, but unicorns as well.

I can’t do it. I tried. I even submitted. But I’m from Alabama and we don’t even refer to our private parts without whispering behind our hands and using cutsie euphemisms. My favorite is hoo-ha, although “cooter” is still popular with women of my generation.

I did my best. I even work in a prison, but I couldn’t get anywhere close to erotica. If you can do better, by all means find the Fine Print Literary contest for Allison Pang’s new release. Search for it on the Borrowing Heaven, Subletting Hell website and see if you can win. If you do, dibs on the darling stuffed animal.

One thought on “X-rated Haiku

  1. “cooter”? Wow now your mom gets the joke she heard on TV the other day! I thought it was a strange bug of some sort. In my day we didn’t have a word for our private parts since there was no polite way to ever refer to them! If you do come up with an erotic haiku–send it in a plain, brown wrapper by snail mail…..

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