I Have All the Symptoms of Olympic Withdrawal

The closest I ever got to participating in the Olympics was this one year…no, I don’t really have a good anecdote about world-class caliber sports training. I was just never that good at any sports, and quite frankly, I have a touch of a lazy streak. If I were in the Olympics and everybody was walking around before the start getting all “in the zone,” I would be the one person thinking, “Geez, that pool looks cold. I bet it’s cold. Can I jump in and get used to the water first?”

But I enjoy watching other people suffer to see if they’re better at something than everyone else on the planet.

I am a freak for the Olympics. I love the opening ceremonies, no matter how ludicrous, and even the ridiculous penis-shaped mascots warm my heart. I love that Granada won its first EVER medal this year, or how, despite the fall of Communism, the Russian gymnasts still have that look on their faces like someone’s going to execute their parents if they don’t stick the landing. It’s all amazing to me.

So I’m going to be suffering through Olympic-sized withdrawals over the next few weeks. The scratching at my skin, the tremors, the hallucinations, it’s all just symptoms of me missing NBC’s round-the-clock live streaming of every sport, and I admit that I’m using the term “sport” loosely. Looking at you, badminton.

6 responses

  1. Shockingly, I’m finding myself going through withdrawal as well! I love that Nicola Adams won the first ever gold for women’s boxing in the Olympics. She is my newest hero.

  2. Yeah, me too. Even synchronized swimming. Oh, MIchelle – As the World Turns!

    1. You know, I was all about As the World Turns, I’d watch it, then my GL, and be all soaped up. Then it got to a point where I just couldn’t watch Jack whore on Carly anymore. But I did love it, when I could stand it at all. But Guiding Light? That show has been watched by my family since it was on the radio. I’d been watching it since I was in diapers. When it went off, it was like having half my family ripped away from me. :(

  3. Why do you continue to mention the word penis in your writing lately?

  4. Richard Wiseman | Reply

    I hate the Olympics and it makes me sick. I’m especially bad as it’s so close to home this year. For me it’s like hay fever; I’ll feel better when it’s over. Here are my views on the Olympics. http://lettersfromnomansland.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/and-in-other-news-those-deserving-real.html
    http://lettersfromnomansland.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/meet-new-gloss-same-as-old-gloss.html Unfortunately my previous blogs on the wasted money and the pagan origins of the Olympics along with them continuing the Nazi propaganda exercise embodied in the torch relay are now in my ‘blogsay’ collection from this blog over the last six months ‘Letters From No Man’s Land’ Volume 1 ‘Green Unpleasant Land’. Oh and here’s a poem on hating Olympics; http://processedwords.wordpress.com/2012/07/29/olympus-shuns-the-people-of-prometheus/

  5. I’m not too excited to see them go either. This is really the first year I actually got into it. I’m pretty sure I haven’t gotten this much use out of my TV since Guiding Light was on!

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